Piggin Out at Little Beach
by George R. Harker
(To hear an audio presentation of this story done by the author, click Audio - Piggin Out)
It may have been a few years ago, or it may have been last month. In
any event the memories are such that it could have been yesterday.
I was walking the path along the rocks just west of Little Beach. I
came across Ula. She was sitting there on a sand patch with her knees drawn
up under her. Her head cradled on her knees. She stared intently out to
As might be expected in such proximity to Little Beach she was nude.
Her long brown hair flowed down her back.
The intensity of her gaze toward the sea was such that I sensed that
she did not notice my coming. Accordingly I softly said her name aloud.
Hoping to break through to her consciousness without startling her.
Apparently I succeeded for she slowly moved her head in my direction
and I could see her sea green eyes moving to center on my own.
"Hello, Dr. Leisure. Long time no see!"
"A penny for your thoughts. You looked so intent I was hesitant to interrupt
"Not to worry. I was just thinking about an encounter I had the other
day at Little Beach."
"Ah, a new romance?"
"Well, you could say that. How did you know?" Ula said with a smile.
"I know you babe," said Dr. Leisure. "Do you want to tell me about it?"
"Yes, I do. For it is not what you think."
It was an idyllic day. The ocean was calm. The Makena cloud had not
moved in to shield the sun. I decided to go for a swim.
As I swam about I was amazed at the color and variety of fish that seemed
to be swimming about me.
One fish in particular caught my attention. It was very colorful and
it seemed particularly friendly. I've never had a fish come so close, except
when I was feeding them. Then of course they would swim right up and take
the food from my hand.
But I had no food and this fish came up repeatedly. It seemed to swim
around me. Then along side. Then above. And then behind. A time or two
it even swam between my legs.
Now that was a trip. The first time it really startled me. I was just
swimming along and I felt this gentle brush against me. I could fell the
whirl of water around my inner thigh. It was like the caress of a lover.
Needless to say I was not expecting the caress of a lover while swimming
by myself and it did give me quite a start.
Later the fish moved about and did it again! This time I new what was
happening and just relaxed. I must say the sensation was very pleasurable.
After swimming for an hour or so and seeing the turtles, I returned
to the beach. The fish stayed with me the whole time. Darting between my
legs numerous times. Sometimes I saw it coming. Other times I did not.
I can not adequately describe the sensation. It was nice!
As I came into the shallow of the shore I lost sight of the fish. I
guess he went back out to the reef. Notice I said it was a he. I don't
know one fish from another. Much less whether it is male or female. Yet
I know this one was male.
Moving toward shore I was surprised to find a young man near me in the
surf. While I had seen other bathers in the water I wasn't aware of this
one as I was swimming in.
He smiled at me. And I said hello. I felt like I had met him before
but could not remember when.
He said something about how beautiful I looked swimming with the turtles.
I asked if he had been out swimming with the turtles. He indicated that
As we walked through the surf and on to the beach, I got this incredible
urge to have sex with him. I never said that to him. Yet I had this feeling
that he knew and that he wanted me as well.
Together we walked hand in hand up the beach and into the Kiawe trees.
There was a small clearing and some soft grass. We embraced and kissed.
I have never been so totally aroused and so eager to couple with any man.
He to was aroused. The size and shape of his organ was magnificent.
It was so large I feared I could not accept it. Yet it was just right!
In a word it was incredible.
We made love for some time. Over and over again he entered me. He brought
me to levels of pleasure I had never reached before.
Finally, and as if by an unspoken mutual consent, we stopped. I rolled
off him onto my back to rest. My eyes closed or at the very least gazing
unfocused off into space. I could feel the warmth of his body nearby.
I don't know if I dozed off or what. The next I remember I felt movement
near me. As I turned my head I saw a form moving down the path. I couldn't
tell what it was. It was a large animal. But what type I did not know.
A few more feet and the moving mass of animal stopped and turned to look
back over its shoulder.
I can not explain it but it was as if the creature was saying good bye!
Then just before it dashed off into the underbrush I caught a glimpse of
its full silhouette. It was a large trim and muscular pig! A pig! I don't
believe I have ever seen a pig around Little Beach before or since.
I turned and looked for my male friend. He was nowhere to be seen. I
wanted to show him the pig. But I could not. Neither was there to be seen.
I slowly got up and walked back down to the beach and lay down on my
towel. I could feel the warm rays of the sun on my back.
I felt so relaxed. I could also feel the warm sensations within my body.
Gentle reminders of more intense pleasures I had known earlier.
Later I awoke and walked up and down the beach making a concerted effort
to find my new lover. Yet somehow I knew I would not find him.
On the one hand it seemed like he was very near and yet on the other
it was as if he had never existed!
Well Dr. Leisure. That is my story. What do you make of it?
I don't know. It sound like a rather incredible erotic fantasy. Could
it have been just a dream?
I thought that my self for a time. Yet when I looked between my legs
I found some abrasions and some slight bruising. Parts of me were very
tender. If it was a dream I must have put on quite a show on the beach
while self stimulating. No, I don't believe I did it to myself!
I walked up to the Kiawe trees. I could still find the clearing where
we had laid. And there in the dirt of the path was the tracks of a cloven
foot. The tracks of a pig! The tracks left from the very spot where I had
laid and ran off into the underbrush.
Could I have been fucked by a pig?
Perhaps! Perhaps not a pig as you use the term. But perhaps by a variation
of a similar theme.
Get serious! I just said that to be facetious. I don't do it with animals.
Pigs or otherwise.
Are you familiar with the Hawaiian legend of the pig demigod?
No. Not really. What are you talking about?
In Hawaiian mythology there is a pig demigod called Kama-pua'a. Kamapua'a
has the power to transform himself from a pig to a human and back. He is
also know to have a passion for women.
Yea, right. Now you are telling me I was fucked by a demigod! Give me
a break. The guy just wandered off. Probably didn't want to wake me and
the pig happened to be walking through the neighborhood. Trying to stay
away from the damn Filipinos who would have cooked his ass if they could
Yes. You are probably right. However there is more to the legend that
I need to tell you about.
Oh. And what would that be?
Remember you mentioned a fish swimming with you. It wouldn't by chance
have been a trigger fish?
You know I basically don't know one fish from another, yet I think it
was. It was similar to that one on the sweatshirts they sell to the tourist.
The one with the long name. What is it?
Humu humu nuku nuku.... or something like that!
Yea, that is a variation of what is commonly called a trigger fish.
Now did this trigger fish have snout that looked a little like that
of a pig?
Well, now that you mention it. It most certainly did! So what are you
going to tell me now? That this demigod pig man can turn into a fish as
You guessed it!
You can go take a flying fuck if you think I am going to believe you.
You are known for your ability to come up with some rather outrageous stories
from time to time. And this sounds like one of those times.
I should take a flying fuck? You are not going to believe this but that
is also part of Hawaiian folklore. The idea of male and female genitalia
flying through the air is also associated with the story or stories of
Kama-pua'a. I suppose if the two flying entities got together that could
legitimately be called a flying fuck!
Stuff it Dr. Leisure. I got lucky and made it with an attractive local
boy. And your telling me I really made it with a demigod who can be a pig,
a man, a fish, or a flying cock! Such a story is more than a good Jewish
girl can really handle.
Hey, I didn't mean any offense. You are the one that brought it up!
True. You will not believe this!
The guy I was telling you about is walking down the beach right now.
Dr. Leisure turned and looked down the beach. Oh, I know that guy! His
name is Keoke. He lives in California. He comes and goes. It can be months
or days between times that I see him.. Maybe you weren't fucked by a demigod
Thanks Dr. That is just what I wanted to hear.
Both watched as Keoke discarded his wrap and walked into the surf..
A moment later there was no sign of him. Instead a fish could be seen
leaping through the wave crests.
Ula looked at Dr. L and Dr. L returned the rather quizzical look.. No
further words were spoken between the two. There was nothing that needed
to be said.
Editor's Note: humu humu nuku.nuku a pua'a variety of Rhinecanthus
aculeatus literally snout like a pig
--Writer Dr. George R. Harker can be reached by email at firstname.lastname@example.org.